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![The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is \](http://img.youtube.com/vi/Hyph_DZa_GQ/2.jpg "The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is \") |
The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass' Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 182 seconds Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions. Related: badass, capital, comedy, court, death, fake, funny, justice, law, news, penalty, punishment, satire, supreme |
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The Onion: Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 180 seconds Our morning show's political correspondent offers tips on how you can seem informed about politics without picking up a single newspaper. Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, politics, satire, voting |
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The Onion: Disney Geneticists Debut New Child Stars Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds Disney claims its latest batch of child stars is so lifelike, youll barely be able to tell they have no souls. Related: brothers, comedy, cyrus, disney, funny, hannah, jonas, miley, montana, onion, teens |
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The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 164 seconds Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 2008, election, machines, onion, the, voting |
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Warcraft Sequel Lets You Play A Character Playing Warcraft Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 179 seconds World Of World Of Warcraft's amazing level of detail makes players feel like they are actually in a cramped, dark apartment playing World Of Warcraft. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: comedy, everquest, fake, funny, games, life, news, of, onion, online, pc, satire, second, warcraft, world |
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Bush Tours America To Survey Damage Caused By His Presidency Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 178 seconds President Bush will seek to comfort victims of his presidency as they try to make sense of the destruction he has caused. Related: administration, bush, cheney, comedy, fake, funny, george, katrina, news, onion, satire |
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Pre-Game Coin Toss Makes Jaguars Realize Randomness Of Life Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds After comprehending the capricious nature of fate, the Jaguars could not go through with the charade of playing a meaningless football game. Related: brady, comedy, football, funny, giants, jacksonville, jaguars, manning, onion, satire, superbowl, tom |
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Poll: Bullshit Is Most Important Issue For 2008 Voters Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 145 seconds For a majority of likely voters, meaningless bullshit will be the most important factor in deciding who they will vote for in 2008. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: barack, clinton, election, hillary, john, mccain, obama, politics, president, voting |
![The Onion: \](http://img.youtube.com/vi/Q_OIXfkXEj0/2.jpg "The Onion: \") |
The Onion: '9/11 Conspiracy Theories Ridiculous' - Al Qaeda Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 167 seconds An Al Qaeda representative says that claims the U.S. government was behind the attacks on Sept. 11th are demeaning to Al Qaeda. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 911, al, bush, center, cheney, comedy, conspiracy, fake, news, onion, qaeda, satire, theory, trade, world |
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Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain's Base Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 186 seconds Experts predict that Joad Cressbeckler could tip the election to Obama by attracting people who want to vote for the most crotchety candidate possible. Related: 2008, barack, comedy, election, funny, john, mccain, obama, onion, palin, sarah, satire |
![The Onion: \](http://img.youtube.com/vi/YBM3j7x4Lcw/2.jpg "The Onion: \") |
The Onion: 'Iron Man' Trailer To Be Made Into Feature Film Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 163 seconds Fans are worried that the feature film adaptation of the beloved trailer won't live up to the original 90-second story's vision. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: comedy, downey, fake, funny, iron, jr., man, news, official, onion, robert, satire, theatrical, trailer |
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The Onion: Sources Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013 Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 148 seconds Unless Americans turn to alternative sources of entertainment, the 'Hannah Montana' star will soon be completely tapped out. Related: all, comedy, cyrus, fake, funny, hannah, miley, montana, news, official, onion, over, parody, satire, start, video |
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Portrayal Of Obama As Snob Hailed As Step Forward For Blacks Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 142 seconds Overjoyed civil rights leaders say that Barack Obama has paved the way for future black politicians to be smeared as country club snobs. Related: barack, comedy, election, fake, funny, john, mccain, news, obama, onion, politics, satire |
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The Onion: Are We Giving Robots Too Much Power? Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 130 seconds Panelists discuss whether controversial decisions by the Robot Congress and President Executron indicate robots have too much control over our lives. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: 1984, government, onion, power, robots, technology |
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The Onion: Domino's Tests Limits Of What Humans Will Eat Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 99 seconds Despite ethical concerns about testing on humans, researchers say their work was necessary to determine the boundary between garbage and food. Related: comedy, dominos, fake, fast, food, funny, news, onion, pizza, satire |
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Poll Reveals 430 New Demographics That Will Decide Election Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 161 seconds A recent election poll indicates vegan independents and skydiving widowers are among the groups that will have a major impact in November. Related: 2008, barack, election, john, mccain, obama, onion, politics, president, satire |
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The Onion: Volatile India-Pakistan Standoff In 11,680th Day Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 151 seconds The threat of nuclear war hangs over the region with no end in sight, just as it has for the past three decades. Related: bush, comedy, fake, funny, india, jihad, muslim, news, nuclear, onion, pakistan, satire, weapons |
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The Onion: Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad On McCain Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 183 seconds In response to Republican attacks, Barack Obama unleashed a series of slightly negative ads that gently point out how McCain could be doing a better job. Related: barack, comedy, funny, john, mccain, obama, onion, politics, satire |
![The Onion: \](http://img.youtube.com/vi/QWdN4hA-rB0/2.jpg "The Onion: \") |
The Onion: 'No Values Voters' Search For Most Evil Candidate Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 118 seconds Both candidates are stepping up their efforts to attract crucial 'no values voters' by abusing animals and murdering the elderly. Related: 2008, barack, comedy, election, evil, fake, funny, house, john, mccain, news, obama, onion, white |
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Hurricane Bound For Texas Slowed By Large Land Mass To South Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 132 seconds Texas residents are relieved that the deadly Category 5 storm just missed them, destroying a horn-shaped land mass beneath them instead. Related: comedy, fake, funny, hurricane, katrina, mexico, news, onion, satire, texas, weather, weatherman |
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The Onion: Diet Book Author Advocates New 'No Food Diet' Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 209 seconds Today Now! talks with a diet book author who reveals that many things are surprisingly edible when you are driven mad by hunger. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: anorexic, comedy, diet, fake, funny, loss, my, news, satire, skinny, story, weight |
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The Onion: How Can We Make The War In Iraq More Eco-Friendly Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 128 seconds Panelists discuss ways to wage a greener war in Iraq, such as driving biodegradable tanks and shocking detainees' testicles with wind power. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: bush, george, iraq, onion, war |
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The Onion: Most Children Not In Favor Of Child Healthcare Posted by: TheOnion
Video duration: 104 seconds A recent survey of children found that they are overwhelmingly opposed to increased doctor visits and vaccinations. More coverage at: http://onion.com Related: barack, children, comedy, doctor, election, fake, family, funny, healthcare, john, mccain, news, obama, satire |
